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flowury:

i want to sit on a kitchen counter in my underwear at 3 am with you and talk about the universe

(Source: flowury, via fake-mermaid)



flannelbuttphenomenon:

life hack: get a tattoo. if the people at the job interview notice it and look concerned, laugh a little and explain “it’s just temporary.”  months later if your boss asks why you lied and said it was a temporary tattoo, stare off into the distance and whisper with a tremulous voice the poor excuse for truth your subconscious has been fighting for its entire insignificant existence: “everything is temporary.”

(via fake-mermaid)



jncera:

If your name is nancy and you get pregnant you will be pregnancy

(via fake-mermaid)